The Priest

Formerly known as Bob (part 68)

Are we alive?

I watched as they crossed the clearing from the trees, crouched down and slipping from bush to bush.

Stuffy came crawling toward me and stared at my leg.

He whispered, “Are we alive?”

Try though we might, it is impossible to escape from the stranglehold that movies and TV have on our lives.

“We’re alive, but we’re confused. Are we the people that were specifically ordered to leave?”

“We are.”

“What the fuck, Stuffy, I told you guys to get out of here.”

“If we had, you’d be lying here by yourself and probably dying.”

“So, you thought you’d come back and maybe join me?”

“No, we thought we’d come back and maybe see if you needed help. Which you do.”

“How did you find me?”

“We didn’t. We followed you, and frankly I’m surprised that you fell for the old decoy in the blanket trick. I honestly thought you were smarter than that.”

“Well, what if Kurtz planned to have you find me because he knew that you would come, and he set this whole thing up just to draw you out?”

“What did he say to you?”

“He told me that he plans to hunt us down, one at a time, and injure us in horrible, agonizing ways, then leave us to die screaming, alone, and in pain.”

Por and Tiki came out of the darkness.

“Does that hurt, it looks like it hurts.” Said Tiki.

“Yeah kid, it hurts.”

“Does it hurt?” He asked again.

“What did I just say?”

“I don’t know, I wasn’t listening because you were talking to someone named kid, and there’s no one here by that name.”

“For fuck’s sake. Yes, Tiki, it hurts.”

“It looks like it hurts.”

“It does hurt.”

“You said that.”

Por was watching the exchange and smiling.

“Hey!” She said.

We all looked over at her.

“We need to figure this out. Right now Kurtz controls the horizontal, and Kurtz controls the vertical, we need to control the narrative from here on out.”

“How do you propose we do that?” I asked.

“There was a movie that had Christopher Walken in it…”

“Of course there was.”

“…he played a guy that was going up against, I think spies or bad guys, I don’t remember which, but anyway he didn’t have any training in being a bad guy or being a spy, so when he did things, none of the people chasing him could figure out what his next move was because he wasn’t following their rules of engagement. Kurtz may be clever and know the way things are supposed to go, and the way people are supposed to respond, but what if we just make up our own rules.”

“I’m pretty sure people like him plan for that.” Said Stuffy.

“Like how?” Said Por.

“My understanding is that when they’re trained, they’re forced to look at all possible outcomes, so if something doesn’t turn out the way it’s supposed to, they have contingencies in place.”

“So, we’re supposed to what, accidentally, happen on the one thing that he hasn’t considered?” I asked. “Wouldn’t that mean going through an awful lot of scenarios to find one that we can turn against him.”

Por looked at me. “Are you always this negative?” She asked.

“I feel like it’s justified.”

“Yeah, okay. It’s just not helping.”

“You never struck me as the most positive person on the planet.”

“Moving on.” She said.

“There are things we don’t have to consider, and those are things that don’t apply in our situation.”

“Like what?” I asked.

“Like everything except what we are immediately faced with.”

“Which is?”

“Everything. He is accepting the idea that we don’t know what he’s going to do, and he knows all of what we’re going to do. That makes him overconfident. He doesn’t view us as a threat, and that’s a mistake that gives us an advantage.”

“Well, well, well, haven’t you become an expert in tactics.” Said Stuffy.

“Yeah, I have.” She said. “I have an advantage that none of you have, and that even Kurtz doesn’t have.”

“What might that be?” He asked.

“I watched him and I watched what he did, and I kept quiet and made mental notes on what could be done while I was his prisoner. His confidence is his weakness, and he doesn’t know it.”

“Do you suppose we could take this conversation to a safer place?” I said.

“There are no safer places, but there are less exposed places.”

Stuffy and Tiki pulled the Priest to his feet, and the scruffy band of rebels headed for the tree line.

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