I'm so sorry Michael, it always hurts to lose a longtime friend. No matter what the reason.
Tell yourself this, "The person that you knew and loved is gone". Those bouts of Covid you mentioned have already damaged\changed your friend beyond recognition. The person he was has died and this new person is the "reboot" version 2.0.
I know from doing hospice care for someone that the mind can die, or alter, long before the body gives out. Someone you have loved for decades can become "someone else" seemingly overnight. When they are dependent on you, all you can do is remember who they were and how much you cared for them.
It's what gets you through it.
When it's a person who is supposedly a fully functional adult with free will, well, if they refuse to help you try and protect your health and safety it speaks to how little they regard your friendship.
It's hard these days, as the world changes around us. Our friends are taking the other fork in the road and waving goodbye. I learned a long time ago how to let friends go because of my military career. When you are changing duty stations every couple of years you adapt to constantly leaving friends behind and making new ones. After a while, you learn not to make close friends anymore. Does that make me lonely? No. I know who I can be friends with and who I can't. I can do acquaintances but not friends anymore and I'm good with that. I feel a lot safer that way.
Maybe you'll be able to mend fences with your friend but maybe not. Sorry but that's part of the new world now. All we can do is suck it up and move on.
I've lost my marriage, my home and most of my friends because I DARE to protect myself and others from a novel airborne BIOHAZARD LEVEL 3 virus that we KNOW invades the brain, attacks and fuses neurons, causes micro-clotting in blood vessels, damages the heart and vascular system, liver and kidney, depletes dendritic cells, infects macrophages, platelets, T lymphocytes, monocytes, megakaryocyte, bone marrow and disrupts and damages your immune system.
I am extremely lonely, but at least I am not sick.
It is the truth of our existence from here on out. I was going to say it’s the sad truth, but I am finding that the longer I live a cloistered life, the more I enjoy it. Perhaps I was a monk or wandering sage in a previous life. Imaginary friends are a good substitute for flesh and blood ones because they never try to get you sick, and you always win arguments with them. :)
I've always enjoyed my own company during the day - it's the evening when I long for someone to cuddle up and commune with. Perhaps one day this ache will abate but for now all I can do is embrace and accept what is....
Sorry you have lost another friend, I can sympathise (to a degree, I lost most of my friends when my M.E led to me being mostly housebound, but Covid has lead to losing even those I thought would understand).
I'm so sorry Michael, it always hurts to lose a longtime friend. No matter what the reason.
Tell yourself this, "The person that you knew and loved is gone". Those bouts of Covid you mentioned have already damaged\changed your friend beyond recognition. The person he was has died and this new person is the "reboot" version 2.0.
I know from doing hospice care for someone that the mind can die, or alter, long before the body gives out. Someone you have loved for decades can become "someone else" seemingly overnight. When they are dependent on you, all you can do is remember who they were and how much you cared for them.
It's what gets you through it.
When it's a person who is supposedly a fully functional adult with free will, well, if they refuse to help you try and protect your health and safety it speaks to how little they regard your friendship.
Again, my sympathy.
Take care of yourself.
Grieve for the loss.
Always move forward.
Let go of the past.
Regard them as dead.
Covid killed them.
Thanks for those words Richard. I am letting a lot of them go.
{{hugs}}
It's hard these days, as the world changes around us. Our friends are taking the other fork in the road and waving goodbye. I learned a long time ago how to let friends go because of my military career. When you are changing duty stations every couple of years you adapt to constantly leaving friends behind and making new ones. After a while, you learn not to make close friends anymore. Does that make me lonely? No. I know who I can be friends with and who I can't. I can do acquaintances but not friends anymore and I'm good with that. I feel a lot safer that way.
Maybe you'll be able to mend fences with your friend but maybe not. Sorry but that's part of the new world now. All we can do is suck it up and move on.
I've lost many friends and family (and pets!) to death.
That was a cakewalk compared to this....
I've lost my marriage, my home and most of my friends because I DARE to protect myself and others from a novel airborne BIOHAZARD LEVEL 3 virus that we KNOW invades the brain, attacks and fuses neurons, causes micro-clotting in blood vessels, damages the heart and vascular system, liver and kidney, depletes dendritic cells, infects macrophages, platelets, T lymphocytes, monocytes, megakaryocyte, bone marrow and disrupts and damages your immune system.
I am extremely lonely, but at least I am not sick.
It is the truth of our existence from here on out. I was going to say it’s the sad truth, but I am finding that the longer I live a cloistered life, the more I enjoy it. Perhaps I was a monk or wandering sage in a previous life. Imaginary friends are a good substitute for flesh and blood ones because they never try to get you sick, and you always win arguments with them. :)
I've always enjoyed my own company during the day - it's the evening when I long for someone to cuddle up and commune with. Perhaps one day this ache will abate but for now all I can do is embrace and accept what is....
Sorry you have lost another friend, I can sympathise (to a degree, I lost most of my friends when my M.E led to me being mostly housebound, but Covid has lead to losing even those I thought would understand).
I think the ones that you think might understand are the hardest.
😢🫂